reply all

My mother is a one upper.  Her situation is always better, worse, more or less than yours.  She will compete over the weather.  "It snowed six inches here...how much did you get?"  It drives me crazy.   She must relate everything back to herself.  I'm pretty sure that this is called something by psychiatrists.  I'm pretty sure it's called Narcissistic Personality Disorder.  But hey, I'm no doctor.  

We all have the need to be noticed and acknowledged.  We all appreciate praise when praise is due.  I am no exception here.  However, I draw my line at the "reply all".  You know, that little button on your email.  It is rarely necessary to "reply all" to a mass email.  I send mass emails all the time to entire teams, classrooms, and committees.  I receive them all of the time, too.  In fact, I got one today, addressed to several people, thanking us for helping with a school flower sale yesterday.  I replied to the sender only complimenting the organization, etc. of the sale. (it was the chairs' first year).  Then they started.  The "Reply All's"...  Now I get to read everyone else's gracious comments of "no problem", and "my pleasure".  These are likely genuine sentiments, but I don't need to read them.  They are not for me...or are they?  

I chair a committee at school which provides a "teacher appreciation lunch" once per month.  I have a team of about 30 volunteers.  Not everyone contributes every month, so I just throw the the dates and themes out there and see what sticks.  This results in a slurry of about 100 emails.  The back and forth goes something like this:

Thelma (to all):  "I can bring the Diet Coke."

Me (to Thelma):   "We already have enough Diet Coke, could you bring some Sprite?"

Thelma (to all): "Sure, no problem.  How much?"

Me (to Thelma):  "Two 2 liter bottles.  Leave them in the cafeteria kitchen." (this is stated in every email, but no matter)

Thelma (to all):  "Okay, I'll do it."

Me (to Thelma):  "Thanks, I'll send a reminder."

Now, read these without my responses.   It looks like Thelma is bringing Diet Coke, right?  That's what "reply all" read.  So then I get these emails:

Louise (to all):  "I thought I was bringing Diet Coke, but it looks like Thelma is bringing it instead.  What am I supposed to bring?"

Me:  "You are bringing Diet Coke, I replied to Thelma to bring Sprite instead, but didn't want to burden everyone with all the information.  Please put it in the cafeteria kitchen."

Then, I get this priceless gem:

Eliza (to me):  "Could you please send out an email to tell everyone to stop sending "reply all" messages?  I am completely confused as to who is bringing what!!"

Yes, this is the clusterfuck that is my committee.   Some of it might be bad email ettiquette habits, but I think that most of it is, "see what I'm doing?"  "I'm bringing handmade whatever, what are you bringing?"  Stop showing off.   I don't care what you bring, just bring it...and put it in the cafeteria kitchen.