I am a reforming "cuss" addict. When I worked in Insurance, cursing was an art form. Way back in the day, right after college, my husband and I were friends with some Southerners who cursed so much, it ceased to take on meaning. Since she was a real life Southern Debutante, she would sweeten it up so that "Butt Munch" was a term of endearment.
I do love Deadwood. If you haven't seen this HBO show, do yourself a favor and rent it. (There are three seasons) It is wonderful. Caveat Emptor: it is gritty, excessively violent, graphically sexual, and "cocksucker" is said about every third word. It's also beautifully written and acted, and the costumes and set are true art. Needless to say, it's one of my all time favorite series.
So back to my reform status. It just doesn't do for a Mom to curse. Not in the car, not at her children, and not, unfortunately, to other Moms. I was made aware that I wasn't doing my best to say things quietly when my son was three. We were at a four way stop, the same four way stop that I have to sit at every day on the way to the school. For some reason, grown up people still don't get the gist of a four way stop, and I tend to get frustrated at that. So on one particular day, I had resolved to hold my temper. I said, "This Bozo needs to just GO!" My little precious in the backseat said, "Mommy, you are supposed to say, 'hurry up, Jackass'!" Tears of mirth streaming down my cheeks, I was nonetheless silenced for a solid month.
So I do my best to hide the cussing into other words. For example, instead of saying, "CHRIST!", I take on the Aussie, "CRIKEY"...or sometimes, the Snoop, "CRIZZLE!". My personal favorite in lieu of "SHIT!", is "SHIITE MUSLIM!". I have a million of these. It's kind of my own little language game. I'm sure that you have a few, too. Please share.
Below are two videos, profanity related, that are hysterical. They are "beeping" parodies, but you still may not want to have little ears and/or boss ears listening in... enjoy.
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